An Empty Nest on Hornby Island

www.hornbyeagles.com
Photo by: Boonibarb

Today I'm going to talk about a little bird ... not just any bird, but a magnificent eaglet named Phoenix, who hatched April 29th on beautiful Hornby Island in British Columbia, Canada. We mourn Phoe who suddenly collapsed in her nest only days beyond her 2 month birthday. Gone way too soon, she is mourned by thousands.

Back in the first days of May, on one like so many others, my Meme looked in on her group on the internet where one friend had posted a link to the Hornby Eagles. "Click" and that was it ... there was little Phoenix, just a tiny ball of fluff, nestled with an ever gentile Mom, nourished by a doting Dad. And Meme, being a bit of a nurturer herself, was hooked forevermore as only she can ever be, and as I can personally attest from my own experience ... once hooked, she's a goner.

What separates Phoe from all the other eaglets in the world is the bond formed among people across the globe through a webcam perched high in the treetop above Mom and Dad Hornby's nest and broadcast live all over the world. At any time of day anyone could go there and watch Phoe grow more each day, watch her antics, see her grow to be just a little bit spoiled and a whole lot bigger most particularly her extremely large, yellow, sort of ugly feet.

And thousands of people came to watch this funny little eaglet. When she was such a fuzzy fluffball Meme worried all the time that some harm would come to her, but as time went on and she became bigger and stronger, everyone became more confident that she was on her way to soaring the skies in just a few short days.

Everyone watched and wrote about Phoenix's antics, her screaming for food, her bossiness, her sweetness and as they watched, they fell in love with both her and her wonderful doting parents. I don't think most of them had any idea that Phoe had wrapped herself so tight around their hearts that what was about to come was going to tear them up inside more than they ever thought possible.

Eventually Mom and Dad Hornby stayed away from the nest for longer periods enticing Phoe to want to move farther from the center of the nest. They would perch on a branch or on the cambox above so Phoe could see that she, too, could do it. And she did ... clumsily for sure, but she did somehow make her way onto the box and back in the nest, wings batting haphazardly with no grace at all. And when she did, hundreds watched in awe at her admirable attempt even though it was hardly what anyone could call a "flight". But it was a start and everyone hungered for more, waiting anxiously, sometimes even impatiently, for her to take to the skies and soar against the bright blue backdrop that is the magnificent sky over Hornby Island.

Every night just before bedtime Meme would click on the live video to check on Phoe and see what people were writing about her, what she had done that day that perhaps Meme had missed. Next morning before she would do anything else (except for walking me of course which remained a priority, thank heaven) she would click on the cam where the picture was still dark and wait as dawn would break over Hornby Island. Phoe would already be up and waiting for Mom or Dad to come with food. Meme would watch and listen to the sounds as Phoe looked out over the landscape that she surely knew would be hers one day to devour and explore.

Especially in the last couple of weeks, Meme clicked more and more on the video, on Chat and Facebook because everyone thought any minute she would fly and no one wanted to miss that special day. Everyone was already worried about what they would do without Phoe being a part of their daily lives, but they told themselves it would be okay because Phoe would be soaring on outstretched wings high above us, flying strong and brave for many years to come.

And as the days unfolded Meme noticed more and more of a camaraderie among "Phoe's Phans" as more and more people would worry about Phoe; she was sneezing, she didn't seem "with it", something was off, she was turning down food, but others would say "Phoe is phine".

But she wasn't fine. Phoe had pneumonia, an acute strain that her little body couldn't overcome at such a young age and even though those who knew there was something wrong had already set the wheels in motion to get her down from the nest so they could care for her, it was just too late.

Nature took its course and that night as the sun set gloriously over beautiful Hornby Island, Phoe valiantly made one last flap of her wings and pushed forward bringing herself to the outer edge of the nest looking out over her world as if about to take flight. And there, where she was loved and nurtured by her parents and adored by her family all over the world, she died as darkness fell over Hornby Island.

So many people looked on that night and the heartfelt words filled with tears and anguish poured out onto those pages that only hours before held such promise and hope for Phoenix.

It was at that moment that Meme knew the full impact of what had happened here. This was about Phoe of course. But it wasn't only about the loss of one lone eaglet on an island some had never heard about before, this was about all that Phoe had stood for in everyone's minds and hearts ... love and hope and promise and all that we reach for in a desperate world with so much anguish and so many unanswered questions.

It was about refuge from the storm, a shining light in the darkness, a beacon of hope and a place to go to escape and simply experience sheer joy and love for a tiny bird about to fledge. Phoe stood for the bright tomorrows everyone dreams about. And now she was gone and that night, for that moment and the days following, it seemed that we had lost a lot more than a little bird named Phoenix. We had lost our ability to soar above it all and make our way to a better time and place.

But one thing I've learned from living almost 10 years and watching more closely than some would think ... there is evil, greed and gluttony out there in the world but it does not prevail and it never will. So much love poured out from around the world over the loss of little Phoe and a bond formed between all those people and gave them hope. Friendships were born and that love will live on even though we won't have Phoe with us.

In our hearts she stood for love, she stood for hope, she stood for truth and clarity. She was simple and sweet in a time of incongruity, tension and confusion.

She lived too short a time and she died a symbol of strength and freedom leaving many feeling at the time as if hope died with her; it did not ... it lives on in the thousands who love her and in many who never even knew her and have still perhaps never even heard of Hornby Island.

"To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven". I don't think there's a bird ever in creation who will live as long in the hearts of so many as our sweet Phoe.

'Til next time ...

Molly

To Topsail Island, A Love Letter ... Filling Our Senses

There are things that are so extra special they fill us to the point we just don't think there can be anything better anywhere at all.

For me, of course, every day is a good day with very few exceptions. There are things that happen in my day that I love more than anything. For instance, I know that after Poppy walks me in the evening that I'll come back to the house, Poppy will unhook me and I will run faster than the wind into the kitchen where always, always, Meme throws me two treats ... never just one, always two. I can depend on it. And then dinner comes with a new bowl of fresh water. How much better can it get?

Well it can. Just before bed Meme takes me out one last time and I know as sure as the moon fills the night sky that when we get back I will get two tiny bones and one big bone right on the bed where we all sleep through the night.

I'm a dog all about habit. I like things I can count on. But then there are those really special times ... the surprises, the once in a lifetimes. And just recently one of those happened for us.

One thing I know ... when Meme and Poppy pack their suitcases to the brim it is either very good news or very bad news. I tend to think it usually means they're going somewhere without me. I'll never understand why they do that; we're a family after all.

But a few weeks ago, after a ton of stuff was taken out to the garage( including two of my precious beds by the way), Meme looked at me and said "Do you want to go for a ride in the car?" Here's another thing I know ... a ride in the car is not necessarily a good thing, but so far in my life if we're all getting in it together, it's good. When it's a vet visit, it's just Meme and me. When it's grooming, it's usually Poppy and me. But all 3 of us??? Now this is what I call a ride in the car!

It wasn't too long sitting up on my bed in the back seat that I knew this wasn't just any ordinary day trip. This was one of those extra long trips that are so special my heart sings. It's stops at friend's houses and Wendy's and McDonalds, Hampton Inns and wonderful parks on the side of the road where there are new smells like you wouldn't believe. So I settled in to sleep through the hours of driving ahead of us and all my dreams along that road were good ones.

And as it turned out, this was a trip that not only brought me lots of good smells, it filled Meme's senses as well. This was a journey she had longed for ever since she was a small child vacationing on Cape Cod with her brothers and their parents.

So we rented a cottage right smack dab on the dune on Topsail Island in NC. Sweet, warm, quiet ... a journey back in time. Ever since those childhood vacations, Meme has wanted to stay for as long as she could right on the ocean. She had never imagined having the ocean at her feet for 7 days, but here we were. She literally could scarcely breathe from the joy of it. Poppy loved it, but Meme was in love. And so was I.

Let me describe bliss just in case you haven't found it. At first light, I open my eyes because I don't want to miss a single second of the day. Meme gets up and attaches me to her as always. She opens the sliding door to the deck and we step out into the morning with the beach and a beautiful blue ocean in front of us. Only one or two early risers run along the sand and we hear nothing but the sound of the waves breaking on the shore. Sandpipers scurry along the water's edge and pelicans skim over the water in perfect flight. And just at that moment the sun starts coming up over the horizon creating such magnificence that we're sure it can't be real ... sun, sand and sea, and very little else.

Meme draws a breath and we venture down the steps and onto the beach. I love the smells of the shoreline and suddenly I run as fast as I can toward the sun. As it rises, the sky and the sea change every minute and Meme has her camera in one hand and me at the end of her other one.

I see a wave come toward me, just a bit of foam, and I wonder about it. I try to go after it but then water comes rushing up at me again and my feet get all wet. If I could laugh, I would. It just feels so good, bubbles and suds everywhere ... and all the time the sand beneath my paws.

There is nothing to disturb us, just the sound of the sea, the gulls, occasionally footsteps running past on the sand. And Meme says that at least for this one moment in time, we have filled our senses to the limit ... and we have found peace.



'Til next time ...
Molly

"The Best of Times Is Now"

Once upon a time, a long, long time ago, and years before I was even thought about, Meme and Poppy met in a tall office building on a dark and rainy night in New York City. It wasn't love at first sight, but it was pretty close. And it almost didn't happen. She had an awful cold, but she'd promised one of her best friends in the whole wide world that she would come to help her move offices that night. As luck would have it, Poppy was the man who designed that office and he almost didn't drop by because it was a Friday, it was cold and raining and he just wanted to get home to his warm apartment.

But she did and he did and a few years later they were married on a beautiful Spring day in the church her parents were married almost 50 years before. They danced to the theme from "Ice Castles" and listened to the amazing lyrics of "The Best of Times Is Now" from La Cage Aux Folles. They sailed away on a beautiful pea green boat and the rest, as they say, is history.

We fast forward 25 years. To celebrate those many years of (almost) wedded bliss, Meme needed to find the perfect restaurant. Mind you, it feels like they've been exchanging gifts for months and for some reason not a blessed thing for me ... the dog who has brought them acres of happiness over the last 9 years.

Meme had seen a review of a restaurant called Top of the Point overlooking the Intracoastal and the Atlantic Ocean. She thought it would be perfect. Then one day Poppy tore an ad out of the paper so decision made! It promised magnificent views from floor to ceiling windows and to top it off the food was supposed to be really good. It's part of The Breakers of Palm Beach so how bad could it be??? So Meme made a reservation.

When friends asked that day what they were doing to celebrate, Meme told them ... Top of the Point sounded almost magical to her. They had to drive around the building twice to even figure out where the valet was, but somehow they managed. All this time, of course, I am again not included and left at home to listen to country music on the Bose. I don't understand why they think leaving music on fools me in any way. I know they're not here .... so who the heck's the music for?

Anyway ... this was not the time for a pity party for poor me. This was their day. They arrived on the Club Level (which I seriously think is the 13th floor because it was 12 and then "Club" ... hmmmmm). They were welcomed warmly and wished a very happy anniversary (yes, Meme had told them of course) and shown to a wonderful table for two by the window overlooking the Intracoastal, the city of West Palm Beach and The Breakers in the distance with the Atlantic Ocean beyond. Wow!

Tom served them and he was wonderful ... courteous, friendly and efficient. Looking back now Meme wondered why they were not offered a drink or a bottle of wine. They don't drink, but usually they are offered a hundred times so this was unusual and Meme was so happy not to have to explain that they reached their limit over 20 years ago and alas could have no more. All would be revealed.

The menu is wonderful and it was hard for them to decide between filet mignon, rib chop, swordfish/salmon/snapper, even meatloaf and lobster scampi, not to mention Duck a l'orange and more. They decided to share calamari, light and crisply fried and delicious, followed by pan-seared Sea Bass with lobster-mashed potatoes, spinach and roasted tomatoes with a light citrus sauce. Meme decided the fish was the best she's ever tasted. Poppy thought he'd skip dessert, but not my Meme!!! Noooooo ... so when Tom came back offering coffee she said "...and dessert, please". He almost insisted they order coffee first which she thought strange, but when in Rome. Soon after the coffee arrived and she was asked where Poppy was. Odd, she thought, but answered he'd stepped to the men's room.

Meme tries to be gracious when she's in a nice restaurant, but she wondered why they needed to know where he was? Anyway, he returned and relief spilled over the server's face. Then Tom arrived with the most amazing dessert Meme and Poppy thought they'd ever seen! There was a huge slice of decadent chocolate 7 layer cake with frosting literally dripping down the sides, there was New York style cheesecake and freshly baked chocolate chip cookies along with dark chocolate brownies, strawberries and blackberries! It was extraordinary! And Meme thought .... WOW! She'd never seen a restaurant come through with such a surprise. But Tom quickly informed her there was a card with the gift.

They couldn't think of who on earth would be so thoughtful. After all, let's face it. Anniversaries belong to the couple. Sure, maybe if you have kids together they come through with a nice surprise, but otherwise who???

They should have known. The very same good friend who introduced them over 30 years ago had arranged this from way up in Maryland. And it just made the night even more special than anyone could imagine. After dinner Meme took pictures of the view from the Top of the Point and in the car coming home she called her friend who solved the mystery. She had told the Manager that normally a bottle of wine would be in order but her friends didn't drink. Meme was really impressed they made a note of that.

This was a night of nights for Meme and Poppy ... a real milestone in their lives so I don't really mind too much I was left alone for 3 hours. They deserve to celebrate 25 years of being married, still loving each other, still having lots to say to each other ... still the owl and the pussycat "hand in hand on the edge of the sand, they dance by the light of the moon, the moon, they dance by the light of the moon."

And the words echo in Meme's head now and always ............

"Now ... not some forgotten yesterday

Now ... Tomorrow is too far away

So hold this moment fast,

And live and love

As hard as you know how.

And make this moment last,

Because the best of times is now,

Is now, is now is now, is NOW!"

'Til next time ...

Molly

Life is Good!

You may be wondering how I'm doing! I'm a little superstitious and didn't want to jinx it, but the good news is I am so much better! In fact, I'm fine. The bad news is it seems I'm better because they changed my diet. If you're one of those people who have to watch what you eat, you know having a "special" diet isn't fun. But it beats traveling down the road I was on!

The only good thing about feeling really lousy is the day you figure out it's not forever, the day you wake up and think .... Wow I feel good! I talked a good game about getting better, but the truth is I wasn't really sure I was going to be okay. Now I'm back to my old self. I've even lost some weight and a couple of times I've actually jumped up on the bed (something I couldn't do for awhile).

So life is good once again. Well ... almost. Guess what came out of the attic? Those dreaded suitcases. Clothes are hanging all over the place, stuff is getting dumped into the suitcases and I know it's just a matter of time until they wheel those things out and I'm left here alone. Well .... "alone" may be an exaggeration. My good friends across the street will come and pick me up every morning and take me to their house for the day. They have 2 dogs so it won't be all about me the way it's supposed to be, but it's a darn sight better than hanging here all day.

I'll come back here to sleep at night; something about territory Meme says? I don't quite get it, but I know I'm not welcome over there overnight. And that's just as well because I like the smells over here. I'm comfortable in my own house. Besides, it's good to check to see if they've come home and no one told me!

Meme says that today is such a special day ... the day before a cruise. Cruising is magic; there's something about being out on the sea with blue sky and ocean surrounding you. At night the stars fill the sky sparkling like diamonds. Back here it's never really all that dark, the cities light the sky and we can't see the stars all that well. But out there on that big ocean they light the night.

Meme tells me that after all the excitement of the day Poppy goes to the Casino and she comes back to their room for some "quiet time". The lights are dim and chocolates sit on the pillows, the sheets are pulled back by the Steward and "towel animals" are placed on the bed (this one looks a little like me, doesn't it?). After she gets comfy in her robe, she steps out onto the balcony.

She looks down at the whitewash of foam slipping by as the ship cuts through the ocean. She listens to the swoosh of the water and gazes up at the magnificent night sky filled with the moon and the stars realizing that now and then you really can have it all. She knows that anyone looking up at that moment sees that same moon and that grounds her and gives her a sense of closeness with everyone she loves while at the same time feeling one with the vast sea and the warm Caribbean night. It's a very special time for her.

And because they love it so much, I forgive them for leaving me back here. I love them. Most of the time I am enough to keep them happy, but every now and then they pack up those suitcases and can't take me with them. That's okay. I am healthy and full of life, I have my friends to watch over me and I know that sooner or later Meme and Poppy will come back home to me.

So life is good.

'Til next time...

Molly

I won't go quietly ...

Everyone knows that I try to be as positive as I can about just about everything, but I'm not stupid. I've been making an awful lot of trips to the vet's office lately and that's never a good sign. Used to be I'd go once a year and that's that. I really like it in their waiting room and try so hard to put a positive spin on being there, but it's never good.

The other night I knew something was up when my water bowl disappeared. Lately I've been drinking an awful lot of water. I can't quite figure out why. And sometimes I lie down where I never did before and I've needed to go out extra times. I'm ashamed to say I've even had a couple of accidents waiting at the door and just not wimpering quite loud enough for anyone to hear. I just hate to bother them, but when you gotta go you gotta go.

I sleep a lot more, content to lie on the bed for hours, but when we go for walks or play together, I'm just as happy as I ever was and nothing really hurts. And I absolutely still love to eat! But I wasn't surprised the morning after the water bowl disappeared when my walk treat didn't show up and there was no food bowl either. Next thing you know Meme popped me into the car and off we went to the vet's office for a blood test. It was over quickly and while Meme paid them(why she would pay for that invasion I have no idea), she fed me 3 of the special treats they have on the counter. So all was well! When we got home my food was back and my water bowl full and I drank half of it in one gulp.

But last night Meme and Poppy went out for pizza and the phone rang. The machine picked it up and I stood listening to my vet's voice and he sounded really serious. Meme was so sure that this blood test was going to be okay, but it wasn't. He said my cholesterol is higher and it didn't sound like high was a good thing. Now they have to send my blood for a thyroid test. And so it goes.

Meme doesn't understand. They cut out all the treats and boy do I miss them. I never get fruit anymore which makes no sense ... I thought fruit was a good thing. Maybe they should give me that again!!!

So we'll have to see what happens. Today is my Birthday. I'm 9 years old and I think I feel pretty good. This is what I know ..... Meme and Poppy will not let any harm come to me, they won't let me hurt, they probably won't have me cut to fix me. They will just make sure that every hour I spend on this earth for the rest of my life will be as good as they can make it for me. Poppy said he's going to take me to my favorite lawn where I can run because Meme read somewhere that exercise is good for me. They'll find something good for me to eat that might be better for whatever's wrong with me (if they can ever figure it out). And no matter what happens down the road I know they are just happy I've been here with them all this time.

I can't make this stuff up. I heard them talking and that's what they said. And it's okay with me. I always knew I'd have to leave this earth before they do! After all, what would I do if it were the other way around? Truth is, I talk a good game but I'm helpless without them and depend on them for everything.

So it's all good ... not for them so much because I worry what they'll do when I'm not here to make them laugh. But they love each other and they'll get through it. It's just not the best of times in our house right now and I didn't want everyone to wonder why there hasn't been a peep out of me since Christmas.

I share the good times and the bad times here and I hope the next time you hear from me, it will be much better times. I'm hoping to be around a good long time.

'Til next time ...

Molly

A Brand New Year Awaits

It's Christmas and Holiday time again and there's a whole new year sitting on our doorstep just waiting for us to open the door and invite it in. This is a joyous time for all of us who celebrate Christmas and Hanukkah, a very special time of year when families and friends gather to share the traditions set down for generations. And sometimes magic happens because people can just feel the spirit all around them and somehow dreams come true and prayers are answered.

"They" say we dogs live in the moment and I guess that's true. This isn't a moment I've liked a whole lot so I'm sort of ready to get out of it and move on to the next one! Meme and Poppy have been a mess because I'm not feeling up to par and they instantly went into doom and gloom mode. Lucky for me it looks like I'm not going anywhere anytime soon, but in the meantime it looks like my diet is going to change a bit and I'm not at all happy about that! Still, a dog's gotta do what a dog's gotta do ... I have no control over what I eat anyway so I might as well just learn to live with it. Meme's been in the kitchen baking and I smell all these delicious smells including peanut butter, but all I get is a cut up piece of my own dog food. Who does she think she's kidding? I know the difference between dog food and peanut butter!!!

I had to visit my vet twice just this past week and they did things to me that shouldn't even happen to a cat!!! Then I had to undergo the embarrassment of Meme sticking a tin pan under me when I'm just trying to pee!!! I tried to tell her to get that darned thing out from under me and give me some privacy, but she was relentless. Seems my kidneys aren't quite right, but I told them they're good enough to get me through the next 5 or so years I plan to be around so just leave me alone!!!

All the boxes came out with the ribbons, wreaths, ornaments and lights. I thought for a minute they were packing again for one of their trips and got pretty depressed, but then I figured out they were unpacking the boxes, not packing them. So now we have three trees with dozens of lights and shiny ornaments; glittery stuff and red bows all over the place. Candles burn to make it smell like pine and balsam, but this is Florida for heaven's sake! Nobody's fooled! Still, I understand it's Meme's little slice of New England so we let her have her fun. The presents are being wrapped and put under the tree, but so far I haven't sniffed anything worth my while to attack.

When I saw how upset Meme and Poppy were I decided to put my best face forward ... figured if I jumped around a little and stood on my hind legs for them, they'd stop putting me in the car and taking me to the vet. So far it's worked and I'll let you know if I have to go back there again. If there's a angel watching over me, she'll make sure I don't have to go back for awhile. It's one of my least favorite places, even worse than the groomer if that can be said.

It seems that snow has fallen almost everywhere, but not here. It never snows in southern Florida. That would be a good name for a song if someone hadn't already used something like it for a song about California. So we're jealous of people with snow because it just makes it seem a whole lot more like Christmas and it's much easier for Santa to land on the roof in his sleigh. I have no idea what he does down here because we have tile roofs and no chimneys so that's quite a conundrum for him.

But I'm thinking somehow Santa will figure it all out and come Christmas Eve he'll make it to every house around the world where children sleep waiting for him. And Christmas morning, as it's been for hundreds of years, the faces of thousands of children all over the world will fill with wonder at the sight of stockings stuffed to the brim, hanging from their hooks by the fireplace and presents large and small laying nestled beneath the branches of Christmas trees that have been adorned with the ornaments of today and generations before.

And I'll be sitting on our bed with my little stocking stuffed with little treasures for me. I'll watch as Meme and Poppy open their gifts on Christmas Day. And on that day, at least for that moment in time, all will be right with the world.

But the biggest present of all is the one as yet unopened ... a whole new year, a fresh start, a bright new beginning. Happy New Year.

'Til Next Time,

Molly

Letting Go of Yesterday ...

It's been months since I've written and that ugly monster, guilt, is setting in. The only things uglier than guilt are jealousy and greed. But I don't know those emotions so I don't feel equipped to talk about them.

It's not really my fault. I wanted to write about our trip to Cape Cod, but my paws are tied. If Meme won't type, I'm out of luck. Meme had sort of a "mishap" at the end of our trip. But overall, just like last year, our month on the road and our time on Cape Cod was pure bliss. Add to that the time we got to spend with family and friends and we came home relaxed and happy, safe and sound, and our life is back to normal.

Just yesterday Meme was saying that guilt is a wasted emotion. It accomplishes nothing, it solves nothing ... just a waste of energy. We can only live for today and there's no point in feeling guilty about what we could have done differently. If it's that important, we should just do it and move on.

We can't always control our guilt because we can't predict tomorrow. We don't always know the outcome of our actions. It's easy to look back and realize we made a bad decision even though it seemed right at the time. So we can't possibly avoid guilt altogether.

But sometimes guilt can be a little self serving, don't you think? We know in our hearts there's something we should do, but for whatever reason we don't do it. And then the guilt sets in. So what's harder? Doing it? Or feeling the anguish of not doing it? The guilt can last an awfully long time ... that's for sure.

Guilt can find its way into everything. Meme even feels guilty about clothes. She feels if she loved them once, she should love them always. If they fit once, they'll fit again. And this can work both ways .... she figures one day she may gain weight again and need those XXL's or she may get really skinny and fit into the tight jeans she bought that never lost their snugness. So every few months she does a "review" of her closet. She takes everything out, lays it on the bed and tries just about everything on as if she's out shopping!!! She never does this when Poppy is around because then he'd know that when she says she has nothing to wear, she's not being completely honest.

Women can be fickle about how long a favorite stays a favorite. All too soon something once cherished can fall to the bottom of the pile, get pushed to the back of the closet or worse get packed in a box under the bed! Every once in a while she'll come across something long forgotten and suddenly it's brand new! She has so many clothes packed in the closet that she could open her own L. L. Bean store. The polo shirts in every color are stacked so high that she can't pull one from the bottom without messing all the ones in the middle.

She keeps thinking she'll take stuff to Goodwill, make some room in the closet. She told me she feels guilty if she lets them go, but she also feels guilty if her closet is stuffed with clothes she seldom or never wears!!

And then there's guilt about family. Lucky thing Meme has no kids of her own because she'd be locked in a cage somewhere by now. That doesn't mean there's not a whole lot to feel guilty about where family is concerned ... the time not spent, the time spent when things were said that shouldn't have been or not said that should have been, the phone calls she didn't make, the invites she didn't send. I think we feel more guilt about family than anything else on this earth. We were born into them and they are born of us. But along the road sometimes we lose touch, grow apart, get busy with other 'stuff' and then kick ourselves for not being as close as we once were. That bond is always there, it never gets completely broken no matter what.

Let's face it; we all make mistakes as we walk through this thing called life. And it's always easy to look back and think about how we could have done something better, rushed to someone's side, made a phone call, chosen a path that turned toward someone instead of away. I always wonder why people are always going somewhere else, they never seem to live where they think they should be ... makes no sense to me.

All of us can feel regret and we learn from that. Thinking back over what might have been is fine as long as we don't kick ourselves in the butt about it. It's done and finished. Doesn't do any good to lie in bed at 4 o'clock in the morning going over the whole thing in our heads. There's a saying ... "you made your bed, now lie in it!" Feeling guilty doesn't fix anything. The only day that we can fix anything at all is today.

As for all those clothes sitting there not being worn? Toss 'em ... take them to Goodwill or your charity of choice. The truth is that coat you don't wear might keep someone warm on a cold day, a new pair of unworn shoes that pinch might not pinch the next person. That orange scarf that makes you look orange, too, will look amazing on someone else and they'll be glad to have it. And if the clothes have seen their better days, do what Meme's friend always says ... "kick 'em to the curb!"

I don't think anyone ever feels guilty about what they gave away ... whether it be clothes, kisses, hugs ..... or just a smile. Even words on a page like these. We just never know when our words will float out there and maybe someone will see something just a little differently. That's really why I write all this down ... I do it to share with you and when I do that, I get back double what I might have given you.

When we give something away, when we share with someone else, we never miss it. We never wish we could take it back. And we never, ever, feel guilty about it.

'Til next time ...

Molly

All Creatures Great and Small

It's summer in South Florida and all the little critters are out. I have no idea where they go in the winter, but there aren't as many around. Heaven knows why because it's much nicer down here in the winter. But summer comes and there are critters everywhere! Meme's always complaining there are bugs on everything, eating her pretty plants, building webs and hornet's nests and heaven knows what else.

Personally I have no interest in either geckos or lizards. I pretty much ignore them because I've been living with them my whole life. But Meme loves them ... she actually builds stories around them as if they have real lives like you and me!!!

We have little lizards who run all over our patio and Meme's very attached to them. Some of them got together in the spring and had little babies. The other night one of the bigger ones wanted so desperately to get out ... almost throwing himself against the screen. So Meme opened the door a little bit, stepped back and out he went free as the wind. Ever since then she's been worrying she took the breadwinner away from the family, upset nature's natural balance in some way and Poppy thinks she's completely lost it.

Every time a big lizard is on the outside of the screen she thinks it's him trying to get back in. And one of the little babies just seems to wait there near the door, looking out. Meme says he's probably hoping his father will come back.

And Poppy says .... "yeah, right ...." and rolls his eyes.

So I got to thinking about all the little creatures out there scurrying around. We have palmetto bugs (which Meme says are just cockroaches but bigger plus they fly), we've got fire ants, spiders and teeny tiny frogs. One really frightening thing down here are the poisonous Bufo frogs. Dogs don't want to go anywhere near those because we can die within minutes. So I keep my distance from them, that is for sure! Meme doesn't make up histories about any of these little creatures.

I chase the birds, but they have this amazing ability to fly and for some reason I can't do that so the chase is fruitless. I ignore the palmetto bugs, stay away from the fire ants, spiders and frogs, even the lizards, geckos and of course those awful Bufo's!!!

But Meme just loves the lizards. And she got to wondering why people seem to warm up to some little creatures and not to others. She's never gotten particularly attached to a fire ant or a spider (although she admits she has always believed that up north you get a Daddy Long Legs in your house and you're in for a lot of good luck).

But she says there's something really endearing about the lizards. First of all, they won't hurt you but neither will a lot of other things. They're sort of ugly, kind of prehistoric, so that doesn't explain it.

The fire ants bite something fierce, the palmettos are just downright ugly and they scurry and we just don't want them around. We don't even think about the snakes because Meme likes to pretend they're not even there. And the spiders spin webs that are messy to walk into and Poppy says it's pretty weird when they land on your head.

So I tried to help Meme figure out what would make the lizards so particularly interesting to her, tried to figure out why she would think up stories about their families, wonder where they go in the winter, which one is the husband and which is the wife, and how long before the babies can go off on their own.

And then it came to me. Lizards are our friends, they eat those annoying mosquitoes, those pesky spiders and ugly palmettos; there is a natural food chain and we shouldn't tweak it. So we're sort of grateful to them and feel they're here to help us.

And besides that (and maybe most important of all) ... when was the last time you saw a spider selling insurance!!??

'Til Next Time ...

Molly

To everything there is a season ...

Sometimes, suddenly and with no warning at all, something just ends. About two weeks ago I was out for my midday walk in the hot Florida sun and along came a man walking his dog. They walk by me all the time and I sniff a hello and go on my way. Everytime that man walks by he says the same thing ... "Oh look, Princess, she looks just like your friend". He then tells Meme that Princess has a Bichon friend a few streets over who looks just like me. And then they walk down the block until the next time.

It's always the same. But this one day a couple of weeks ago along they came again. I noticed Princess seemed a little different, sort of alone, ears flopping down, tail sort of dragging. And this time the man told us that Princess' friend had died. We both got so upset. It sort of stayed with us and all the way home Meme kept saying how sad she felt that the little dog had died. Yet we had never met that little dog; we knew about her and so we grieved for her.

And then last night Meme got an email from a friend. The email said that someone they knew on an internet message board had suddenly passed away the night before. Meme felt so terribly sad even though this was a person she had never met, yet still a person so full of life in the way she wrote about everything. Meme felt she knew her even though she'd never seen her face. And there were so many others who felt the same way even though most of them had just talked with her on this strange thing called the internet.

The world has changed a lot in Meme's lifetime. Time was when each person's world was just family, the people who lived in the town and a few aunts and uncles who would visit now and then. Now people can have an impact on others throughout the world because of the internet which is broken down into a whole lot of little communities where people who have similar interests can come together and share their experiences.

Eventually, for everyone, life on earth ends and sometimes with no warning, like a whisper in the night. When it comes so quickly and so often way too soon, the shock of it is really painful and what is seemingly a quiet night whisper becomes a painful roar in our heads and it will not go away.

So many lives are touched by the loss of just one person ... the lives of those who knew her well and loved her so much and also the lives of those who didn't know her that well at all. These friends who hardly knew her suddenly realize they'll never get to meet that person they hoped to meet one day. And those who knew her well realize they'll never get to touch, to hug, to hear her voice on the phone. We see words on a page just written the night before making her so alive, like any moment she'll drop back in and write some more.

But she won't. And just because some of us never met her, just like I never met the little dog down the street, we still grieve for her and we will miss her.

For Rita ... Blue Skies always.










'Til Next Time
Molly

Happy 4th of July!!!

It's that time of year again when I have to dig up my ear plugs. Despite the noise and the fireworks, I sure do love to celebrate America. Every day we keep our troops in our hearts and in our prayers. They serve our country and protect the liberties we enjoy. America's Independence Day is a great day to really shout our support and our thanks from the rooftops. Thank you to all our Armed Services stationed all over the world, thank you for fighting for our freedom.

While everyone's eating their hot dogs and hamburgers, corn and potato salad, we should just take a second to remember how lucky we are to live here. With all the debate about what is best for our country, I still believe that just about everyone is pretty darned glad to be here. Leave the arguing to the pundits and just get out there and celebrate the absolute best part of this country which is all of us.

It's been a little crazy around here these past few weeks. Those ugly suitcases were out again as Meme got ready to head up to New England for her pretty important high school reunion! I was left here alone with Poppy which would have been okay except next thing I knew his suitcases came out and he disappeared, too ... something about a grandson graduating from high school. Big woop.

I thought "uh oh!" ... now there's nobody here. That's just a little more independent than I ever want to be! So our good friends and neighbors came and got me and took me to their house where I stayed during the day. I can't even imagine what would happen to me without them! They brought me back here at night because they already have two dogs and I'm the odd girl out. I like my own house better at night anyway, but just so everyone understood that I was not happy with the situation I made a little deposit in the house a couple of times ... nothing really major, mind you, but just enough so they would get the message. Boy did I get an earful about that when Meme came home! But how else can I let them know that these little disappearances just aren't acceptable???

Everyone's back home now and life is as it should be. If we could just block out all the bad news, we wouldn't have a care in the world. But a day doesn't go by that there isn't something happening that gets Meme all upset. She's usually pretty optimistic, but there are days it catches up with her and she says she's down in the dumps. I try to cheer her up with my cute, funny face but it doesn't always work.

Still, it's time to look forward. We've got our trip all planned in a couple of months. We're all getting in the car together which is my absolute favorite. Yup! It's back to Cape Cod for a few weeks ... yay!!! What I love is I know that it's just me, them and the open road. It's a time for McDonald's fries and overnights with friends and families. This time we're staying in nicer hotels; more "upscale" Meme says because she was miserable at the Comfort Inn last year. So it's Hampton Inns for us!!! By the time we're back home it will be fall and we can open all the doors again.

And anyone who knows me knows how I feel about open doors. I look for them everywhere ... nothing but good on the other side.

Happy 4th of July!

'Til next time ....

Molly

June's A-Bustin' Everywhere!!! Let it in ...

Yes, it's that time of year again ... flowers blooming, trees ablaze with bright green leaves offering shade from the heat of the sun, children out of school for the summer and just aching to get to the beach or the lake to swim and play in the warm sun. Glorious summer has arrived and stretches out before us like a welcome carpet unrolling forever in front of our eyes.

Maybe for some! But here in southern climes, it's a time to start thinking about hurricanes, stocking up on water and non-perishable foods (whatever that means ... my food is always non-perishable), and closing up the house and throwing on the A/C lever.

And that means it's time for me to watch out!!! All through the winter I just walk in and out of the house. The sliders are open and I can actually make a circle from the living room onto the patio and back in the bedroom. It's fantastic. But now, come June, all the doors are closed up and it's pretty darned hot out there on the patio. And if I don't look out where I'm going I smash crash right into the closed sliding door. I know because I've done it! And it hurts!

It's hot on our walks some days. Poppy doesn't seem to have the same spring in his step. And there's something really ugly in the grass that sticks to me. You should see all the fuss when I get back from my walk and come bounding in for my treat hearing Meme say "what a mess you are" and she has to pick me up, put me on the counter and start combing out all these bristly things that get stuck in my soft white fur. But that doesn't stop me from jumping on the grass and burrowing my nose into all sorts of good smells.

The big fear of swine flu seems to have died down now even though people are still getting it, but the media got tired of that story and moved back to politics and the economy. They just can't seem to stop talking about that. Doesn't matter what channel you put on, it's everywhere. And I'm getting tired of it. I've taken to just jumping off the bed in the morning because Meme and Poppy get their coffee and put on the TV with all these heads blabbering about who knows what and who really cares? Everyone already has their opinion on everything anyway so they can talk all they want and nobody really changes their minds so what's the point really? Meme keeps pausing the TV so she can rant on about this or that and Poppy says why does she let herself get so aggravated and so it goes on and on. I just go nap on my bed away from all the clamour.

Finally this morning Meme just said she's had it. She turned off the TV. Can you imagine? Silence in the house ... peaceful gentile silence that wanders through the rooms and allows the soft sounds of birds singing outside to filter into our house. I can even hear the breeze blowing the palms outside. I can warn everyone when the UPS truck rattles down the road. There's a very different sound to the UPS truck ... Meme always knows when it's near and sometimes runs down the front walk to flag him and give him a package to return to some store she bought something from. I never understand why someone would go through all the trouble of ordering something just to send it back again. Just busy work from my point of view.

Have you noticed how I can babble on about absolutely nothing? I can just go on and on, words tumbling out, with no direction and no purpose. That's sort of how I see all this TV stuff ... just a bunch of nothing going nowhere, round and round in circles always coming back to the same old stuff. It's exhausting and wears on my nerves.

Time to enjoy the summer. Time to get outside and head for some playtime, get away from the TV and the babble and the pundits who just love hearing themselves talk. Time to get back to family and ball games, making sand castles on the beach, and ball runs. Ever make a ball run? They're great. Pile up a whole lot of sand, make tunnels, put the ball on the top and let it run down the mountain and though the tunnels.

It's summer, it's time to play. If it's a nice sunny day, take your dog on a long walk. Leave the iPod at home and just listen to the sounds of summer. Walk on a beach and listen to the laughter of children. Hear the seagulls battling it out for any food they can find. Feel the comfort of watching the waves break against the shore.

It's summertime. I'm talking and Meme's writing all this down and it's still nice and quiet in here, just a pure golden silence except for the clicking of the keys, the sound of a hammer fixing something across the lake, a bird singing a really happy song and the palm fronds moving ever so quietly just outside our window.

Summer ... time to ease up and just let it wash over you making you just so happy to be alive.

'Til next time ...

Molly

In Sickness and in Health

Okay .... I really try to hold my tongue sometimes because Meme tells me it's very easy to offend people these days and it's something she says is "just not done".

But I have to say it ... enough with the sanitizing, de-germification, anti-bacterial fumigation, and so forth and so on. And time to stop blaming all these viruses on the pigs and the birds, next thing you know you'll blame the dogs ... ENOUGH!!!

You don't have to listen to me. Meme knows this stuff. She's lived a looooong time and according to her (you just gotta trust this woman, believe me), the more germs you kill around you the better chance you're going to get sick. I'm not saying there aren't germs out there because there are, billions and billions as Carl Sagan would say. Gosh I miss that guy! But I digress.

I can see you now ... you're thinking what does a dumb dog know? Or even dumb Meme? But hear me out. In my eight years on this earth I have never had a cold or a flu bug and I have never used a paw sanitizer or an anti-bacterial wipe in my whole life. Heck, I'll eat off the floor, the road, you name it!!!

My explanation for my well being is simple and short. I have one hefty immune system that comes from constantly sticking my nose and mouth where feet and heaven knows what else have been. I've got my antibodies working twenty four seven. And look at me ... the picture of health and I'm no spring chicken.

I travel with Meme and Poppy and we stop at those 'in and out' motels along Route 95. You know the ones ... you never see another living being from the time you arrive 'til the time you leave, just cars coming in and driving out? Meme says some people go into these rooms with a cartload of cleaners and disinfectants and pretty much steralize the room before even setting foot in there. They make sure to wear slippers and spray that smelly Lysol stuff all over the phones and remotes. They pull the cover off the bed and throw it in the corner of the room or on top of the wardrobe (Meme admits she does do this sometimes).

Don't get me wrong. Of course we need to take certain precautions. Just wash your hands to Happy Birthday and leave it at that. And, sure, you might pick up a little virus along the way, but getting a little sick now and then reminds you how great it is to feel good! You know how it goes. You're down with a cold for a week or so, just miserable, rolling around in bed, drinking fluids, downing Vicks cough medicine (admit it, you sort of like that part), you just want to die. And then one day you wake up and say "Hey! I feel better!" You bound out of bed and you feel so strong you could fight a bull! And you fly into the day just happy to be alive. So you need those little illnesses now and then just to remind you how well your body works when everything is chugging along the way it should.

Seriously, ease up on yourself. You don't have to clean every surface you touch. You were given a good strong body to combat all those awful germs. Keep your kitchen counters clean, careful with your cutting boards, and wash your hands frequently.

You'll be fine. Trust me.

'Til Next Time,

Molly