~ Being 70 ~

Well she's not really 70, not quite. But it's coming on like a freight train. She's trying to decide whether to hug it and own it, or defy it and fight it. She's leaning toward the latter; I'm pushing for the former.  After all, she's already way past 69. I say hug it and love it ... we're talking just a tiny baby step to the big 7-0.

I'm not going to tell you all the nasty stuff that goes on with every passing year after 60 (not 50 like you heard ... turns out 50 is the new 30 so you get a pass for that decade). But 60 is 60 and not the new anything. So after 60 stuff starts happening; slowly so you don't notice until you wake up one day and there are hairs growing where they shouldn't be and not growing where they should. 

Suddenly your skin starts getting little spots that expand on a daily basis and little thingies seem to come out of nowhere in the most alarming places. And no way I'm going to waste our time talking about the ugly thing your face does as the skin starts making its way to the ground without the skull you thought it was attached to!!! And other things fall down I can't even begin to describe.

Nope! Rather than focus on all that negativity, I want to tell you about the blessings of being 70. Meme's going to tell me them, but she has to reflect for a bit. Then I'll write it down so that when the time comes down the road, or even if it's already here for you, knowing these things will lift your spirits and brighten your day.
'Cause that's what I'm here for in case you didn't know.
There's the ocean at dawn before the sun comes up, when yours are the only footprints in the sand except maybe for mine. And the sun slowly rises saying "Lucky you, I'm giving you a bright new day". The difference in greeting that day being 70 is that you have the time to appreciate every single second. You see grains of sand where once you saw the beach. You see the sandpipers scurrying along the edge of the water instead of the dirty old shoe washed up on the shore.
And even if you see that shoe, now there's something beautiful about the way the shoelace falls on the sand creating rivulets as the tide turns away. The morning light plays against the worn leather. You take a picture because you need to capture that moment and hold it close to your heart forever. Now you have time to dream for a moment and imagine a loving couple down by the water years ago. They kick off their shoes to walk along the water and somewhere further down the beach, they forget about their shoes. Years later, there's that shoe washed up on the sand with the sun reflecting the years tossed by the ocean. You have the time now to reflect and smile about that.

The laughter of children takes on a new note since they were your own, back when you had to worry if they were strolling off or swimming out too far. Now their laughter blends with the breaking waves creating a symphony as you pass, the laughter fading behind you as you stroll by. Your own laughter feels joyous, easing all that may lie heavy in your heart and makes you feel as light as the air you breathe.

You wear a badge of the pain you've felt and the loves you've lost. You can still feel the exquisite pain of a 16 year old girl when the love she was so sure would last forever somehow ends. A pain so excruciating that she is almost sure her eyes will never dry and assuredly never stop burning. And 25 years later when that boy dies, the pain returns as wrenching as it was all those years ago. Of course you can tell all this to the 16 year old girl and she will look at you, eyes misted over, recognizing only your complete and total stupidity because how could you possibly know what she is going through. But you do. And that may not help her, but it definitely helps you.

At 70 you know how music makes you feel, taking you back to a special day at the beach on the Rhode Island shore when you sailed all day on a sunfish, hopped in his convertible to drive the long way home, top down, heat on and a cold wind blowing across your faces .... "What's New Pussycat" played on the radio. The sunshine made you both a bit fuzzy and you got lost on roads you knew well, but somehow you followed the moon and found your way home wrapped in a moment you would never forget. Music brings back memories so perfect; probably more perfect than they actually were.

Meme says that throughout a woman's life her friends are as important as family. Being 70, she is proud to count her best friends on one hand ... the friends she's known for 10, 20 and 30 years, who have seen her at her worst, her best and all those places in between. Some live close and some live far, but they are always there for her and she does her best to be there for them. Then there's the wider circle of friends ... the women who add laughter, lend support, send out a Birthday wish and soothe her when she bleeds. She feels her friends encircling her, securing her in a safe place. It takes years to feel this fortress of friendship. Friends are the foundation that hold you up and support you and you know when to walk away from what doesn't.

A nap is one of life's greatest blessings that all God's creatures enjoy as babies. Dogs are smart enough to never stop napping from birth through our final breath. But for people at some point the naps stop and don't start up again for decades. And then one day it's nap time again. No one knows better than me how good it feels to let a light blanket settle over you as you lie down in the afternoon, your eyes close and a soft, blessed sleep comes over you for a little while.

And finally, if you're really lucky, you've been married for a good long time to someone you know so well you can guess what he'll say next, who stands by you even when you're at your worst. You go to sleep at night comfortable knowing he'll be there with you as long as you both take breaths. You reach a level of contentment you cannot experience at 20, 30, 40 or even 50. You are settled, your roots firmly planted, you know who you are and finally you actually like yourself. You no longer question yourself nor apologize for who you are.
Sure you have less to look forward to than what you look back on, but is that necessarily a bad thing? I think maybe not. There's a reason we're not here forever.
And the good news is that dogs live less time than people so I'm catching up to Meme. I'm not 70 yet, but before you know it I'll pass her. And when all is said and done, I'm going to be there waiting on the other side and we'll cross that bridge together ... you know, the rainbow one with the pot of gold.'Til next time ...Molly